How Do You Like Me Now?


~ Inspired by Shadows of the Day’s blog post, “What Makes Characters Likeable?” ~

We all have the urge to be liked by our surroundings. We want people to think of us in a positive light because the last thing we want is to spur bad thoughts in their minds when thinking of us. For this reason, some people, like myself, find it difficult to wrap their heads around the idea that someone, or some people, may have unfavorable opinions about them. And when coming to the realization of this, many of us start to questions why those people are not fond of us and we start to ask

What can we do to make ourselves likeable?

At a young age, I would’ve done everything possible: change my appearance, interests, group of friends, etc. in order to be liked by my peers. If I spotted someone who gave off even the smallest look of disliking toward me, my ultimate goal would immediately shift to investigating why. I could not stand the idea of being stored in the negative category of someone’s mind. I couldn’t bare it. I remember in elementary school I’d stay at home “sick” various days because I did not want to be the reason why someone couldn’t have a good day. I remember in fourth grade not wearing my favorite shirt because of one rude remark one of my classmates had given me. I remember not having the courage to try out for parts in the school play because no one thought I could fulfill the role. I basically missed out on opportunities of displaying my true identity for the sake of pleasing others and it wasn’t until late into middle school that I slapped my conscience and spotted all the wrongs of changing myself in order to fit this “likeable” character I assumed everyone wanted me to be.

The point is, I’ve come to realize that there will always be someone out there who doesn’t share the same interests, attitude, and personality as I do and that is perfectly fine. They may not like me because of those reasons, but that will never again discourage me from continuing to be myself. And as wonderful as it would be for everyone in this world to magically admire and appreciate one another, I’ve found that life doesn’t work that way. We were all made to be opposites whether it be to attract one another or to repel, so to answer this question of what we can do to make ourselves likeable, it’s to simply be ourselves. As long as we like what we want to like, dress how we want to dress, and do what we want to do, we will no longer have this desire of being liked by everyone in this world because, believe it or not, there will be people who will truly appreciate you for all your parts and it just a matter of time and patience that your paths will cross.

From now on, I will never sacrifice who I am  just because someone has a problem with it. There’ll be people who will come across me some point in my life and they may hurt, judge, or dislike me, but I will never allow that to define who I am. After all, I can only be myself and no one else and I hope you realize that too. That is the key to being a likeable person.



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